My life as a divorced ‘man’ in India left me all alone, into bits & pieces..

My life as a divorced ‘man’ in India left me all alone, into bits & pieces..

Divorced life goes from awesome to sad – you experience every shades of emotions. The only difference is this time you have to deal with it all alone.

Its been 15 months since my divorce & things have changed a lot. The idea of life without the person I dont have anymore is dreadful.

I initially denied the fact that am all alone now. Anger was obvious. How could she do this to me? What was my fault? and tons of similar question flooded my mind.

So, this is my life after divorce:

My Family & Friends

  • Live with parents now.
  • Communicate less with dad.
  • Do babysitting gracefully for my niece.
  • Have good repo with siblings.
  • Still dont speak for myself to anyone.
  • Friends don’t know about divorce.
  • I try not to disturb parents & other family members for my stuff.

My Sunday & Holidays

  • For me some weekdays are good & some horrific.
  • Sunday haunts now. Nothing to do.
  • Now I get up early on sundays & holidays too.
  • Make plans for holidays, but dont execute them.
  • Go all alone for movies now.

Eating

  • No eating out. NO fast food.
  • No special demands at home too.
  • Absolutely good with whatever mom cooks.
  • Sweets & ice-creams no more on list.

My Workplace

  • NO leave from work now.
  • No reason to go home early.
  • NO negotiation for upraisals with boss.
  • Finish assigned work before deadline.
  • Invested free time to make money by doing part time work.

My New Habits

  • Started working out regulary.
  • Controlled over eating habit.
  • Snoring has stopped.
  • Watch webseries instead of TV programs.
  • No fight for remote & newspapper.
  • No more procastination.
  • Now speak less & listen more.

General

  • Have learnt to say NO.
  • Learned to buy my stuffs.
  • Skip social gatherings often.
  • Have ample of free time now.
  • Like reading. so I read a lot.
  • Have sleepless nights often.
  • Do cry sometimes. Do feel pain.
  • Stopped explaining others about my divorce.
  • Not interested in materialistic things now.
  • Feel like full of energy & life sometimes.
  • I think everything is normal. But never it is.
  • Now I dont bother about things that I dont have.
  • Never order anyone for a glass of water or cup of tea both at home & office.

Finally, have made peace with myself & the loss incurred. Nothing has stopped. All those thoughts & memmories do surround me once in a day, but now the intensity has reduced. I have learned to cope up with all these. Bit by bit am moving on.

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